Intent

Greetings All:

I trust that you survived and hopefully thrived the holidays. How many of you set New Year's resolutions? How many of those have now been broken?

I prefer to focus on intents, rather than goals or resolutions. I know it just a word. However, it is the word that makes the different in the brain that ultimately affects the feeling and the experience.  Intent is more gentle and opens the mind to possibilities. Intent suggest varying degrees of improvement and change, rather than the did or did not.

At the end of each day, identify three things you enjoyed during the day. Set an intent for the next day.

At the beginning of each day, identify what you are grateful for and remind yourself of your intent for the day.

These two simple ideas will make big differences in your thinking and in your life. There is always something we can remind our self that is positive in our life. We can always focus on a positive intent for our day.

Make a Great Day

Dr. Susan

With children returning to school, I hope that children are learning other skills at home.  As we saw in the movie "Nanny McPhee," there are five things every child must learn:  1) To go to bed when they are told (and to say "please"); 2) To get up when they are told; 3) To get dressed when they are told (and to say "thank you"); 4) to listen; and 5) to do exactly as they are told.  

Giving children these social lessons are vital to successful development.

When my oldest grandson was eight years old (he is now sixteen), he told me, "Kids need five things:  to be loved, to be listened to, to know they can learn, to be thanked, and to be taught."  I think he is very wise.

Professional observation suggests that third-graders need to learn four things to be successful in life.  As children learn these four skills before or during third grade, they will be successful in anything the rest of their lives.  In the unlikely event that they do not learn these four things, they will spend the rest of their lives struggling a bit and wondering why they are not as successful (until they learn them).  These four keys to success are:  

• RESPECT FOR SELF AND OTHERS
• BASIC WRITING SKILLS (yes, spelling counts, grammar counts, and cursive writing is nice!)
• BASIC MATH (2 + 2 really is 4!  The brain works on algebraic equations.  It is always solving for "x" and looking for balance.)
• READING SKILLS (texting and emails do not count, but thanks for asking!)

Happy school year!  Make a great day.

Dr. Susan

Travel

Good Moring All: Travel is good for the body and the soul. Like many behaviors and activities in life, there is a spectrum. We get caught up in the all or nothing thinking of travel is a trip for a destination. Travel can be a quick 5-30 minute break in the yard, the tub, a quiet room, across the street, across town, or around the world. The idea of travel is to "get away" and take a break. We need to travel every day for a few minutes. Take a trip in your mind, with a friend to lunch, play with a pet, enjoy watching children play. STAY AWAY FROM YOUR TECHNOLOGY if you truly want to travel. Many times while traveling I only engage the use of technology 2-3 times a day. I also like to travel where there is no "cell service." We can also do that by "turning off" or walking away from the technology. I read a report that stated in centuries, civilization may look back at us and wonder what that extra appendage is that we had attached to us. Take mini vacations, small trips, and learn to enjoy life every day. There is something beautiful and thrilling in every life in every day. We have to discover it ourselves. No one can point it out to us. Make a Great Day Dr. Susan

Pay Day (Continued)

Greetings All: Have you had your play day (moment) today? In my blog yesterday, I talked about the importance of a Play Day. Usually we do not get the luxury of actually having a full day. The Play time can be a few minutes to perhaps a few hours. The main purpose of a play time is to relax, get away from the task, (as a task), enjoy yourself and have some fun. For many people a plan time can include task, such as gardening, organizing a closet/room, painting, etc. To each his/her own. My dad use to tell us kids growing up poor and on a farm to make our own fun and that we could, if we wanted to, make anything fun. My father was a great example of making work fun, and enjoying every day of his life. He had plenty of issues, challenges, and difficulties. He taught to rise above them and to focus on the positive. We do get a choice to find something positive every day, or dwell only on the negative. I love roses. Every rose that I have seen, and that I grow has some thorns. I can focus on the beauty of the rose, or on the problem of the thorns. I prefer to focus on the beauty of the rose. We also need to focus on the beauty that is within each of us. Focus daily on 3 things you like about yourself. This can even be part of your play time. If you notice small children then talk about the good things about themselves as they play. We could all learn a lesson from this. Make a Great Day Dr. Susan

Have a Play Day

Greetings World How many time have you scheduled a play day for your children? How many times have you scheduled a play day for yourself? We all need a play day. Children know the value of a play day. They know they love the interaction. They learn life skills, new skills, relationship skills, and cooperation. Children also learn confidence and letting go, through their play. As parents, we often teach children through play. As adults, we also forget the value of play in our life. It allows us to take a moment and enjoy what is going on around us. If you want to live in the here and now, learn to enjoy moments of play throughout the day. We need to enjoy something every day. Too many of us have such a large task list that we do not get to the enjoyment list. We can actually do both. Work and tasks can also be fun. What do you enjoy doing? Some adults have a difficult time even answering this question. Play will allow you to release negative feelings and thoughts. Play lets you enjoy the moment. Be good to yourself, and Make a Great Day. Dr. Susan

The Best Day

Greetings All: Today can be one of the best days of your life, if you focus on the positive, find something to be grateful for, and laugh at something. These are 3 skills that Vicktor Fankal used while in concentration camps during the holocaust. He stated, "we do not always get to choose our circumstances, but we can always choose our attitude." He also stated that if he could find something positive, something to be grateful for, and something to laugh at I a concentration camp, anyone can do the same think in any situation in their life. Today really can be great, but how we think about what we have, who we are and possibilities. Make a Great Day Dr. Susan

Lasting Happiness

Greetings All: Are you happy? It is spring - which also means a plethora of different and changing weather. Kind of like our emotions at times. We can obtain temporary or short term "happiness" in the form of shoes, chocolate, spending, media, etc. What I want to discuss today is "Lasting Happiness." Happiness is a term that the definition is in the mind of the beholder. There are many forms of happiness, and many people have their own definition which we may or may not agree with. According to research, in the fields of sociology, psychology and theology, most lasting happiness comes from more intrinsic forms, and less material forms. We do need to have our basic needs met, food, clothing, shelter. As human beings we are more likely to find happiness with people and through things. Simply accumulating "things" and buying may result in a temporary (chocolate) high, but there are few long lasting happy and satisfying feelings that come from accumulation of things. A happier person is the person who has an appreciation for simplicity and not for accumulating more "things." Most people also find more true and lasting happiness by serving other than by being selfish themselves. Selfishness moves us away from God and away from others. When we serve other, we find joy and happiness. We are more grateful and are more aware of the positive things in our life. We become more in touch with who we are, the ore we get out of self, and into gratitude and service. We all have personal strengths or qualities. Each day identify a personal strength or a few qualities. As you do this will be more grateful, have more self-esteem and have more self-confidence. Use your qualities and strengths to "drive" and determine your behaviors. Happy people have close meaningful relationships in their life. Most of us find our closest relationships with our family. These relationships can also be some of our greatest challenges. It is very important to love our family members and to recognize that neither they or we are perfect. We will offend them and they will offend us. Look for the positive and the blessings in self as well as others. Identify something every day that you can be happy about. Make a Great Day. Dr. Susan